Can I sit next to you?
If you like.
How old are you?
I’m 40.
Ohhh, but you look young.
Thank you.
Do you have children?
No.
(Sad face) Do you have a husband?
No.
What no husband! But you have had boyfriends?
Yes.
Lots of boyfriends?
A few.
Lots?
Not lots, but a few. If you don’t have a husband you can have boyfriends.
You are older than my mum and my dad.
Am I? Not everyone gets married and has children and that is ok too.
(Pondering this fact, but unconvinced) You are the oldest number in the world! What would that be?
I don’t know what the biggest number in the world would be...
You look 900 million years old!
Oh, I thought you were going to say something nice to me. If I am that old then you will have to carry me off the train because I’ll not be able to walk!
Ok, I will carry you. Are we at Derby already? (slumps in seat, develops a sudden tummy ache and doesn’t want to get off the train)
Yes, we are. I used to live here years ago, long before you were born.
I am nine, ten in November.
Bye bye, go safe, nice to talk to you.
Bye bye.
